One of the greatest (and deceptive) feelings is a feeling of authority or power.
I remember Grade 7, when I was only 13 years old. I was chosen as a prefect for my academic success and my overall personality. I actually hated it. I did not want to participate in sports and culture events and all those stuff. I actually got into trouble with the teacher in charge of the prefects for my lack of co-operation.
I never wanted to dominate others. I did have the authority to command students to do certain things, like pick up those papers, go tell that teacher this or that and similar things.
For me what I liked was the immunity from the powers of others. As a prefect myself, no one save the teachers and the four head prefects had any authority over me. I remember once when a girl that I utterly despised, also a prefect, told me to do something. I just smiled condescendingly and walked away. She has no authority over me. That I liked.
The other part about being a prefect that I liked was the invisibility it provided. Each year our school had a athletics competition. In it people basically compete so that the winners can take part in the inter-school competition.
All the prefects “had” to help at certain areas: high jump, shot put, relay, etc. While the athletes competed and the prefects helped out, the rest of the school had to stand on the stadium and dance to the songs they played. In my previous six years I absolutely hated being there.
But that year I was a prefect. I didn’t have to be there. But I also did not care for my obligations as well. So I got my best friend (still to this day) away from the stadium and we just walked around the school. After all, who would think this prefect is just abusing his position?
Seeing a student walking around would cause suspicion and the teacher would immediately command him to return to the stadium. But as a prefect nobody cared. They would simply think I was on some errand. It is this invisibility that I greatly abused on numerous occasions, though never to the detriment of others.
Even worse, numerous times me and my other best friend would have the last period off because of a teachers absence. In those cases I didn’t think twice about simply walking out of the school with my friend, way before the school came out.
Looking back I realise how wrong it was of me to abuse it so and to be so inactive with my duties. In my defense I always thought, “I wasn’t chosen for the time I have (we had to work some weekends, though I never did), for my social skills, my culture capabilities or my efficiency at exercising authority. I was chosen for my personality and academic position, so screw all of this nonsense”.
I guess that teacher who scolded me extremely regret ever giving me that position.